Mary Kathryn Muckenhoupt

Mary Kathryn (Heath) Muckenhoupt, known to all as Mary Kay, was born on February 23, 1940, died peacefully on September 2, 2024, at the age of 84.

Mary Kay’s early life was eventful. Her father, Edward Herbert Heath, served in the U.S. Navy, and Mary Kay and her mother, Kathryn, were living in base housing at Pearl Harbor on the day of the Japanese attack. Fortunately, her father was near Guam at the time.

After her father retired from the Navy, the family settled near Amherst, MA. Mary Kay was a diligent student, and a 4-Her, winning several “chicken of tomorrow” awards for her prize-winning poultry.

She graduated from UMass Amherst with a BA in Sociology, then went to work at Mount Holyoke college as “House mother” for a dormitory, managing young women’s behavior in the era of mandatory skirts for high tea. While working there, she met and married Benjamin Muckenhoupt, who was spending a sabbatical year teaching mathematics there.

The Muckenhoupts moved to New Jersey. They settled in Neshanic Station on a 7-acre plot of open land adjoining the Raritan River. Mary Kay earned an MA in sociology at Rutgers, and then was thrust into the miasma of parenting with the arrival of two children in two years: Meg and Carl. The family also acquired a variety of pets over the years, including but not limited to a minimum of three cats at a time, a dog, a guinea pig, at least 6 gerbils, and a freshwater tank with several fish and a singular frog who escaped and perished in a regrettably dry closet.

When she was not caring for a house of children and animals, Mary Kay was trying to help the world become better. She did a lot of that.

In the 1970’s, she worked tirelessly for women’s equality. She was a member of Somerset County NOW, and NARAL, and brought her daughter to at least one event to support the Equal Rights Amendment. She also volunteered at the Middle Earth shelter for teens in Somerville, and was an active member of the Somerset Unitarian Fellowship (since disbanded) and served as vice president of the Princeton Unitarian-Universalist church. She also served as a leader of the local 4-H Prep Club, the Mini-Monsters, and kept the desk at the Neshanic Station Volunteer Library.

Mary Kay also had an artistic streak, and a strong affinity for plants and the outdoors. She earned a second bachelor’s degree in landscape architecture at Rutgers in the 1980’s. Although she never professionally practiced as a landscape architect, she used her skills to benefit the community. She served as the president of the Neshanic Garden Club, training fellow members in flower arranging and design and carefully writing descriptions for entries that won the club dozens of awards at New Jersey state garden shows. She organized crews to create a sensory garden at Anne Van Middlesworth Park, and to install gardens at White Oak Park and in front of the Neshanic Station Stationhouse.

All the while, she was giving talks to garden clubs about historic gardens, and gardens she visited in her many travels with her husband. She also served on the board of Historic Rockingham, a house that served as Washington’s final headquarters in Kingston, NJ.

She was an atheist who subscribed to the Freedom From Religion Foundation newsletter and a puzzle enthusiast who finished the New York Times Sunday crosswords every week, including the cryptics. She loved theater and musicals, and admired Carol Burnett, who looked a little like her. In her later years, Mary Kay knit sweaters for her grandchildren and took cruises with her husband before dementia began stealing her memories.

A brief memorial will be held for her at Wildwood Cemetery, Amherst on Saturday, September 7. In lieu of flowers, memorial donations can be made to the Harris-Walz campaign (kamalaharris.com), Historic Rockingham (www.rockingham.net), or the Alzheimer’s Association (act.alz.org/)

Arrangements are under the care and direction of Wright & Ford Family Funeral Home and Cremation Services, 38 State Highway 31, Flemington, NJ.

You are encouraged to visit Mary Kay’s permanent life celebration site at www.wrightfamily.com to light a candle of hope, leave messages of condolence, share words of comfort and recollection, and post photographs of her life.

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Wright & Ford, your local, family owned & operated “Life Celebration Home”

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